Marti’s Mom and Earless

Dear Marti’s Mom,

We’ve all heard horror stories about pets that get loose in a cargo hold and are never found and even worse heartbreaking accounts. However, hundreds of people fly every day, taking their pets along in the cabin and in cargo. I’ve talked to breeders of expensive dogs being shipped to exotic destinations and to everyday people who were moving or just going on vacation. They all put their pets on planes, and everyone survived to tell the tail (Ha!)

It’s hard to get a good handle on this since the primary customers can’t talk to us. But here are some basics.

In the Cabin
If your pet can fit comfortably—that is, sit, stand, and turn around—in a kennel roughly 7–9 inches high, 12–13 inches wide, and 15–23 inches long, he/she might be able to go as your carry-on, placed under the seat in front of you. Sherpa’s soft-sided pet carriers get good reviews from travelers (www.sherpapet.com). Go to your airline’s website to get the exact dimensions and print them out; then, take the measurements to the airport. Also, it’s a good idea to grab a tape measure. Stories abound in news forums of ticket agents who dispute the size of carriers.

All airlines have limits on how many pets can travel in the cabin, and they generally won’t guarantee your pet’s reservation in advance. So, plan to arrive at the airport at least 2-1/2 hours before flight departure to get a boarding pass. Next, get out your wallet because it’s going to cost you at least $100 each way to put Puff in the same place your laptop case usually goes.The payback is that you know your baby is safe with you.

Cargo
If your pet is too large to fit beneath your seat (like Marti), she can fly cargo on your same plane. Each airline has its own rules, but generally, you will need a very sturdy hard-sided crate (no wheels) that is large enough for your animal to stand and turn around inside. PLASTER the crate with your pet’s itinerary, your contact information, and a friendly sign that says “Hi, my name is Marti!”

All airlines have minimum low and maximum high temperatures that dictate when animals can be flown in cargo. The cargo compartments themselves are temperature and pressure controlled; however, some airlines leave pets on the tarmac to be boarded last, so outdoor temps can be disastrous.

Some airlines work harder than others to make sure that you and your pet have a positive travel experience. Continental’s PetSafe is one of the best.* When flying Continental, your pet will be kept in a temperature-controlled building until the flight is ready to leave, and you’ll be notified while in your seat that your pet has been loaded. On arrival, animals are removed immediately and taken to a building to wait for you. Some other airlines don’t show the love, so make sure you research consumer reviews.

If you can afford the best—or if your company’s relocation package is paying—specialists from PetRelocation will make your pet’s travel arrangements, come to your house to pick up your baby, and shepherd him onto the plane. On arrival, they’ll meet the plane and deliver him to your new home or to a top-notch boarding facility until you arrive. It’s expensive but can be well worth it. This is especially true when you are traveling internationally; someone to help you navigate the legalities can be key when dealing with quarantines and specific health regulations. PetRelocation has some great free resources on its website, including videos and an “ask the experts” option
(www.petrelocation.com/pet-relocation-resources). PetTravel.com also has a comprehensive list of tips
(www.pettravel.com/news_pet_travel_airline_cargo.cfm).

*It is unknown at this time how the United/Continental merger will affect this program.

Dear Clever Traveler,

I got on a plane last week and was seated next to a person who started talking the minute she sat down and never stopped. I had planned to work the entire flight. I tried to tell her that, but I couldn’t shut her up—for 3 hours! How can I handle this in the future?

Talked my Ear Off

My Poor Earless,

We’ve all had this experience, and it’s excruciating. Three hours of time to work, read, nap, or just enjoy the fact that you don’t have to talk to anyone is a priceless commodity, and it’s your right to enjoy it how you choose.

A similar situation recently took place next to me. I was on the aisle, a delightful young soldier sat in the middle, and a somewhat creepy older guy was in the window seat. Mr. Creeps tried to talk to me, but I had my earbuds in and a stack of books, magazines, and newspapers in my lap, setting up a solid wall of “don’t talk to me.” The young girl in her BDUs was obviously raised to be polite, and she was defenseless.

The minute she sat down, he started on the weather, her duty assignment, her family, HIS family, the children’s books he writes, and his unpublished novel. She nodded politely and smiled. She got out her book but didn’t open it (big mistake). By the time he moved on to advice that she hadn’t asked for, she was clearly uncomfortable. When he got up to use the restroom, I silently handed her my spare set of earbuds.

We all want to be kind, and one should always say hello to one’s seatmate. It’s certainly okay to indulge in a bit of small-talk if you’d like. However, when it’s time to cut it off, most people respond to signals. At a polite pause in the conversation, put in your earbuds or put your nose in your book. If he persists, practice a neutral nod followed by pointed inattention—that usually does the trick. If that approach doesn’t work, be direct. Tell him that you’d love to chat but that you have a job interview/dissertation defense/felony pardon to prepare and need to concentrate.